Patton Oswalt

Patton Oswalt

Oh wow! Flattered!!!

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Patton Oswalt

It’s just part of the process.

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Patton Oswalt

So stoked to be a part of this. Grab yer blood buckets and get to the theater, NOW!

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Patton Oswalt

I loved the movie OPPENHEIMER about the race to build that world-changing negotiation.

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Patton Oswalt

THE POWER FANTASY, EXQUISITE CORPSES and anything and everything by Tom King, Mark Russell and Deniz Camp.

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Patton Oswalt

Guys, WEAPONS is fucking great. Zach Creggar is YOUNG which means we’ve got decades of his brilliance ahead of us. Yay!

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Patton Oswalt

The lonely boy and his A.I. pal.

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Patton Oswalt

My brain fritzes out in the middle of a new bit. Come watch the ongoing collapse September 19th at The Paramount Theatre in Austin. Grab tickets here: tickets.austintheatre.org/12216/12217

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Patton Oswalt

Holy shit this thread…

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Patton Oswalt

💯💯💯💯💯💯

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Patton Oswalt

Can’t believe Neil Young outlived him. I always assumed it would be… (puts on sunglasses) ..Neil before Zod.

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Patton Oswalt

I miss him too, Donny.

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Patton Oswalt

This is brilliant. 💯💯💯💯💯💯

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Patton Oswalt

Fairfield, Connecticut! I’m heading your way! Join me at the @shucommunitytheatre on Saturday, October 18th at 8:00pm for a night of laughter or misery...your choice! Tickets onsale now! Grab your tix here: pattonoswalt.com/tour/

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Patton Oswalt

On Monday, August 18th, the 4K restoration of Tobe Hooper‘s horror masterpiece, The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, will return to theaters for ONE DAY ONLY! Catch the film along with an exclusive sneak peek of the upcoming documentary, Chain Reactions, featuring me! Get your tickets now on Fathom.com.

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Patton Oswalt

The future (hopeful and optimistic): Flying cars and jet packs! The future (reality): You will never stop filling out forms online.

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Patton Oswalt

QAnon — a celebrity’s best friend.

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Patton Oswalt

I guess we’re okay with this. (Feel free to RT this over the next few days, weeks, years, forever)

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Patton Oswalt

It ain’t easy being a superstar.

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Patton Oswalt

Every day I’m inspired by the bravery of these courageous ICE agents.

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Patton Oswalt

We found our Bizarro for the sequel!

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Patton Oswalt

Raleigh, NC! Join me September 12th-13th at the Goodnights Comedy Club for absolutely no fun 2 nights in a row! Grab your tickets now: pattonoswalt.com/tour/

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Patton Oswalt

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Patton Oswalt

Aw man. Ozzy, then Chuck Mangione and now Loni. How many original members of Black Sabbath are still alive?

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Patton Oswalt

Contribute if you can! Wes is a comics genius and I can’t wait to read this one!

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Patton Oswalt

THE TEXAS CHAINSAW NOISE COMPLAINT #MildHorror

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Patton Oswalt

You’re never too small to dream big. From the studio that brought you Spider-Man: Across the #Spiderverse and producer Stephen Curry, #GOATmovie is exclusively in movie theaters February 2026.

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Patton Oswalt

Hell yes I bought 5 sheets of the Chris Ware USPS stamps. Wow! Lookit this design!

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Patton Oswalt

New Substack post!

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Patton Oswalt

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

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Patton Oswalt

We’re down to the final tickets for tomorrow night’s PATTON OSWALT & FRIENDS at Largo at The Coronet! Head over to the Largo website and grab what’s left! See you there!

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Patton Oswalt

They finally caught The Zodiac.

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Patton Oswalt

The Sandman Season 2, Volume 2 is out NOW! Catch me as Matthew only on Netflix!

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Patton Oswalt

We didn’t know how good we had it with Stephen Colbert @colbertlateshow.bsky.social Oh no, wait, we totally did.

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Patton Oswalt

New Substack post!

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Patton Oswalt

gawt-DAMN

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Patton Oswalt

I will only be at SDCC on Thursday, but make sure to come to the panel ‘cuz we’re announcing some big stuff!

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Patton Oswalt

I love @vidiots.bsky.social so much.

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Patton Oswalt

Cincinnati, Ohio! Let’s go bananas! Join me December 11-13th at the Go Bananas Comedy Club for 3 nights of laughter! Grab your tickets here: pattonoswalt.com/tour/

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Patton Oswalt

Love how he prepared for this journey these past months. Beautiful final show, embraced what was happening. Went out like the true searcher he was.

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Patton Oswalt

I love this so much.

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Patton Oswalt

Oh HELL yes!!!!

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Patton Oswalt

Idiot “comedian” Joe DeRosa has a new comedy special on YouTube. Yeah it’s funny and brilliant and like non-stop laughs blah blah blah but can’t it be from someone PLEASANT? youtu.be/qXQR_eqfFUg?...

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Patton Oswalt

All Time Restaurant on Hillhurst at 8:29am on a Sunday while “Wichita Lineman” plays.

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Patton Oswalt

I only pooped on cars when I was preparing to do YOUNG ADULT.

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Patton Oswalt

Lightning round went so fast that this nerd laureate forgot to mention SANDMAN MYSTERY THEATRE artist, Guy Davis!

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Patton Oswalt

My brain is a thrift store on fire. New Substack post!

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Patton Oswalt

Remember when BARBIE came out and there were months of online discourse about it and then you went and saw BARBIE and it was an excellent, funny, well-made film? SUPERMAN is an excellent, funny, well-made film.

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Patton Oswalt

OH MY GOD I just went in here to buy a copy of INTO THE WOODS and the cashier had the WORST attitude and I think I screamed at her imfreakingoutimfreakingoutimfreakingout

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Patton Oswalt

Lenore is an amazing, talented artist who needs our help. Pitch in if you can?

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Patton Oswalt

Really roundabout way to say he’s definitely on the Epstein list.

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Patton Oswalt

Wilmington, Deleware - I'm heading your way! Join me for some laughs on Friday, October 17th at The Playhouse on Rodney Square. Can't wait to see you all there! Grab your tickets here: pattonoswalt.com/tour/

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Patton Oswalt

“Superman is too woke!” Literally the first page of the first ever appearance of Superman:

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Patton Oswalt

😂😂😂😂😂😂

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Patton Oswalt

This eternal dipshit.

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Patton Oswalt

substack.com/@pattonoswal...

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Patton Oswalt

James, I am beyond flattered to be on this list, but there is a HUGE drop-off in available “strike funds” by the time you get to me.

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Patton Oswalt

So glad we all get to experience the Most Ironic Independence Day In American History.

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Patton Oswalt

Underneath Los Angeles lurks an amazing new horror comic. Literally.

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